Have you ever stood at a beautiful scenic viewpoint with a friend, enjoying the view, pointing out aspects to each other to soak in and absorb? And somehow the moment was more special because they were there.
And then another time, alone, wishing someone was there with you to share the moment - somehow knowing it would be better if there was someone there who could see what you were seeing - perhaps 'see through your eyes'. These moments when shared become somehow more precious and fulfilling.
Imagine now the long stretch of our emotional lives over the years as an 'emotional landscape', with ups and downs, pleasant green valleys with sparkling streams, or perhaps parched dry deserts, or dense dark forests or raging torrents of rivers, or a solid immobile entrapping glacier, or forbidding mountains…
Some of us may have been lucky and had friends to share our perspective or view with during this journey over our 'emotional landscape'.
Many of us have had to make it alone. There was no map, or guide; no one to point the way, or help us up if we stumbled. No one to say: 'Yes I see that', 'that is incredible!'; or perhaps: 'No, I see something else' and 'But look over here!'. No one, until now…
This handbook is dedicated to, and my thanks go out to, the men of my men's group, who have shared their emotional landscapes with me. My journey began with me being so cut-off from my feelings that it is no exaggeration to say it took me a week to realise what it was I experienced a week ago! Of course I stumbled more than a few times, not being able to 'see' the terrain I was in. These men helped me to start to 'see', and supported me when I couldn't/wouldn't, and eventually to 'connect' and be much more in the moment:
Thanks also to Gervase Bushe, who wrote the first handbook for Vancouver M. E. N. - some of his ideas appear in this handbook - coloured by my own interpretation.
This handbook does not presume to be the 'last word' in men's work, merely a source of material that you may benefit from working with. Any mistakes are my own and of course reflect my current level of awareness, or lack thereof! My hope is that this is a beginning, and that this handbook will grow to incorporate many more ideas and issues that a men's group could work with to raise its consciousness. Perhaps you would like to contribute (with accreditation), and write a meeting for us?- or perhaps a whole new level we haven't even considered! Please write to us at the address below
Vancouver M. E. N.
PO Box 57052,
2458 E. Hastings St.
Vancouver, B.C. V5K2K6 - no longer exists
Copyright © 1996 by Felix Markevicius
100% of net proceeds from the sale of this handbook are donated to Vancouver MEN, a registered non-profit society.
Our number for phone messages is:
(604) 290 9988 - no longer exists
Visit our web page at
http://www.netlegal.com/vancouvermen/ - no longer exists