Meeting 7-3
Focus: Taking a Dive

The basic structure of this meeting is the same as Meeting 1.1 - refer back for more information.

Some issues may have come up during check-in that the group may wish to spend more time on rather than moving straight into the 'focus'; or perhaps some issue is still to be dealt with from the previous week. When it is appropriate the leader moves the group into the main focus for this meeting.

5) The Big Bit in the middle - the leader announces the focus of the meeting

Focus: Taking a Dive

"There are numerous other metaphors for this behaviour - 'leaving the castle', 'going through the doorway' to the next level and so on. When it happens it's usually spontaneous and dynamic! It may be apparent to some that we've reached a new level, as one man shares some profound issue - others may not notice or go into shock or divert or 'caretake' to fix the problem etc"

"There may be a sense of increased tension (that may provoke the reactions mentioned above) or it may just feel 'weird' or unusual. Whatever, it is just not normal stuff - it's something new and different and usually highly charged."

"The group that can identify and recognise the significance of what is being shared will be better placed to allow and support this process, and prevent any diverting or projecting by other men who may be unable to own their own stuff in the moment."

Exercises

  1. Reflect on parts of yourself that somehow have been cut off from you - perhaps something you want to be able to do or be but 'don't know how'?
  2. What aspects of yourself have you consciously buried?
    (See Meeting 7-1 Conforming)
    1. Why? Have you been shamed?
    2. Is group ready to hear you and support you?
      Are you ready?
    3. What do you need to ask for to explore this issue?
    4. What does it feel like to anticipate going into that place?
    5. What do you think will be the benefit?
    6. Can you ask to schedule a time to do that work?
  3. What kind of personalities have your partners had?
    1. Compared to your own?
    2. Did/do you complement each other? Did/do you clash?
    3. What traits did/does your partner have that you would like? Were these cut off? Are you developing them now?
  4. Do you have any personal issues that you have not shared with group? Why?
  5. Are there any group issues that have come up during group that you have not confronted but did not agree with what happened?
    Why didn't you confront them? Are you ready to now?
  6. What do you see group as being able to do for you in this process of self-revealing? Is the group a safe place to do this?
    Are you working towards this?
  7. Can you acknowledge a risk that someone took in group to work at this level?
    1. Were they supported? Was their process stopped?
      How? Why?
    2. Is it timely to go back and re-address this issue, with new awareness?
  8. Do you see yourself as needing to do work at this level?
    When do you think you'll you be ready?
    Will these men be able to support you?
    How much confidence do you have in them? Why?
  9. Describe what your 'whole' personality would look like, after recovering all repressed aspects.